READ IT HERE
The most important years of a child’s life
Sigmund Freud Sigmund Freud is the most prominent name in all psychotherapy. He is considered the father of the psychotherapy movement and his ideas permeate later theories and therapies. According to Freud the first few years of life pretty much determine all that follow. Freud believed that during the first five or six years of life each human being throughout the entire world and since the beginning of mankind is confronted with certain stages of development. Failure to successfully pass through these stages or experiencing a trauma during one of these stages supposedly results in inexplicable damage to one’s psyche.
3. Young people
4. Schools and teachers
6. High Vibrational Thinking
7. Inner Resistance
8. How to give children a happier life
9. How to get rid of Your Inner Resistance
10. How it may work
11. The negative rut
‘The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice’ -Peggy O’Mara-The mother of four grown children, she has gained international celebrity as publisher, editor and owner of Mothering Magazine
This book is aimed at parents, teachers, charities and organisations that work with children or young people, or indeed anybody else that may be able to use it. The purpose being, to help bring awareness to how vitally important a child’s formative years are and why it is absolutely essential to make every effort to create the best possible energy environment for children to grow up in. This is explained using High Vibrational Thinking which is a concept that gets right down to the nuts and bolts level of how it works. This viewpoint is in itself empowering and I believe sheds a new unique and extremely powerful light on the subject. And this simplified perspective will hopefully make the information accessible and understandable to many more people.
This is a basic introduction to the workings of the human mind not an overcomplicated thesis, it’s written for the masses not the few. It’s for the mothers, fathers, aunties, uncles, grandparents and any other adults that come into contact with children. Spreading awareness is the key and the more people that understand how it works the better. Young people need to be brought up in the most positive energy environment possible with extra special emphasis on the first six years. This is when they are at their most absorbent, sensitive and fragile and when they need parents and adults around them that are well informed and vigilant, vigilant at maintaining the energy levels in the family home, kindergarten or school etc, at the highest possible levels.
The first six years and the experiences you encounter you will effectively be stuck with and this will generally determine the life path you will travel for the rest of your life. It’s a short six year window to get it right and spreading the word about how and why it is so important for the children in our care is the goal. The more people that understand exactly how it works and make the adjustments necessary to ensure that our kids get the best chance in life the less negativity we will see in the future.
There will be less bullying, drug abuse, crime, depression, injustice and suffering of every conceivable kind. It’s all about the first six years, the better job that we do now, the better place the world will be for them and future generations to grow up in. The children in our care now are the future, if we can begin to get it right with them this will ripple out through them into the rest of the world. The person you shape them into being will over their lifetime touch thousands of people. Imagine what we can do if we all come together and purposefully steer our children into a better life, into a more positive mindset that leaves them with a better state of being. Instead of what is generally happening now, which is we are unknowingly steering them into a more negative mindset because this is what has happened to us.
Then they spend the rest of their lives predominantly as a generator of negative energy rather than positive energy and this reaches out and affects all of us. Research tells us that we have between 12,000 and 60,000 thoughts per day. According to some researchers 98% of those thoughts are exactly the same as yesterday and 80% of them are negative. It’s incredible how negatively the majority of us are thinking.
This means the negative cycle goes on and on as we pass it down from generation to generation and its only going to stop when we all wake up and realise what is happening. As we are now most of us are programming our children to think negatively. If we consciously make the effort to understand how it works and act upon that information to give our kids a better life through encouraging and guiding them into a better state of being at an early age we can together begin to change the world for the better.
‘Let’s raise children who won’t have to recover from their childhoods’ -Pam Leo-An independent scholar in human development, a parent educator, a certified childbirth educator, a doula, a parent, and a grandparent
Parents I believe bringing your children up is the most important responsibility you will ever face in your life. This book will explain to you exactly how important your role is and how much influence you have on the future of your children.
Most parents never have the opportunity to learn exactly what psychological developments take place during childhood and are therefore generally unaware of just how much they are shaping the future of their children. This means they are often unprepared to help negotiate through the many negative scenarios that can and do damage children when they are growing up.
I want to change this and help to educate parents in a simple enough way so that they understand what takes place and are then empowered to be able to make the necessary adjustments to ensure that their children come out of childhood in the best possible positive mindset for their lives ahead. Parenting is hard enough but without a basic understanding of the psychology involved many parents are left floundering in the aftermath of the endless negative experiences that go hand in hand with bringing up children today.
It is my goal to give that basic understanding and thus enable and empower parents to be able to more efficiently deal with the inevitable ups and downs of parenting in the modern era. I have tried to explain this in as simple a format as I can, so that hopefully as many people as possible can understand the psychology at play and really benefit from it.
I believe it’s not that complicated once you grasp the basics. I hope you enjoy reading this book and are then able to use the information to help steer your children to a happier and more successful future.
‘At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of parents’ –Jane D Hull- Colorado Parenting Matters.org
Young people are also encouraged to read this book so that they too can understand more about the process of growing up.
The more understanding young people have of how their own mind works the more chance there is of them steering themselves in the right direction. Without this knowledge the majority of young people are like a rudderless ship and completely at the mercy of whatever negativity turns up in the life experiences that they have.
Gaining a basic understanding of how their mind works at an early age will hopefully encourage young people to take control of their own lives and possibly even open them up to the pathway of self-development. And self-development is a wonderful step in the right direction to a more successful and happier future. It is a pathway that once stepped upon and engaged draws you along at your own pace as you continuously seek to better yourself and your life situation.
However, often a catalyst is needed to prompt the individual onto that pathway and maybe for some this book can be that catalyst. Having the knowledge and belief that you can change and positively improve your life is essential to help young people become motivated to do just that. And of course once they see they can change things the sky is the limit.
‘Everything you say to your child is absorbed, catalogued and remembered’ -Maria Montessori-An Italian physician and educator best known for the philosophy of education that bears her name, and her writing on scientific pedagogy
Schools and teachers
Schools and teachers play a very important role in a child’s life and can also have a major impact in pointing them towards a better and happier future. Of course the main influence is still the parents but a good school that understands how a young child’s mind functions especially during the early years, can go a long way to helping overcome poor parenting and enhance the affects of good parenting.
In this book you will see how the energy environment that children grow up in makes a huge difference to the future that they will have. This also means they will in turn be better equipped to be parents themselves when the time comes. Ensuring that your school provides the best possible ‘energy environment’ will also have positive reverberations on other potential problems that many schools face, such as bullying, bad behaviour, truancy, poor grades etc. In fact in almost all cases all negative behaviour traits that young people fall into such as bullying, self-harming, drug abuse, crime, anger issues, etc are simply a manifestation of the inner negativity that they carry.
Do your best to educate your staff about your schools energy environment and how a child forms their inner negativity and you will be taking major steps forward in terms of helping prevent the negative behaviour traits from developing. Understanding how it all works is the key and then using that awareness to manage negative energy in the most positive way will ensure that your school keeps the energy environment at the highest possible vibration. This gives the children the best chance of developing the least possible inner negativity.
Everything in your school will improve once you see the importance of and make the effort to create the best energy environment for the children. Grades across the board will go up, behaviour will improve and you will see less negative behaviour traits developing.
Your role in a child’s development cannot be underestimated especially Primary Schools when the children are still in the hyper sensitive information downloading stage. This is when the energy environment is most influential and the affects will and do last a lifetime. Secondary schools also have a huge responsibility to ensure that they too do the best that they can to keep the energy environment as positive as possible, so as not to undo any good influences picked up in the formative years and to keep the positive momentum going. A positive school environment will be a happier and easier place to learn, as well as having a calming influence on the sometimes turbulent years of puberty.
Schools are helping parents to shape the adults of the future and any understanding that helps them to do that better has to be a positive step forward. Many schools of course are already doing a wonderful job and I hope this book can help them in that incredibly important work by giving them a new perspective and additional tools to use. Helping young people form the best positive outlook on life is the key to changing our world for the better and we all have a responsibility to do whatever we can to make that happen.
Understanding how it works ourselves is the first step and then using that knowledge to ensure that children in our care experience the best possible energy environment is the second. It’s up to us to do the best for them that we can.
‘If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them and half as much money’ –Abigail Van Buren- Pauline Esther "Popo" Phillips, also known as Abigail Van Buren, was an American advice columnist and radio show host who began the Dear Abby column in 1956
Does experiencing a difficult childhood extend into and have an impact on the rest of your life? The answer to that question is a resounding YES! You better believe it; the experiences of your early years have a monumental influence on the rest of your life. Whether you are successful or unsuccessful, happy or unhappy, healthy or unhealthy, rich or poor it is all massively affected by your early years and the most influential people in your life at that time are of course your parents.
Your parents are all important and the home environment that they create impacts every cell of your being. Every single one of us has been through childhood and our childhood experiences essentially shaped our adult life. I want to help parents understand how important this highly sensitive time period is in a child’s life and to empower them to do the best for their children.
The key to this is ‘High vibrational thinking’; this allows a shift in perspective to be gained, which in turn enables parents to see how their children are affected. This allows the parents to make adjustments and negotiate through the inevitable negative experiences in a more positive way. They become empowered to handle things differently bringing a better quality life experience to their children, this in turn ensures that their children carry less inner negativity into their adult life enabling them to excel and feel more comfortable with themselves.
Being comfortable with yourself and having positive, high vibrational thoughts about yourself is the secret to a happy and fulfilling life (this is often referred to as loving yourself). The less negativity you carry about yourself the better your life will be in every conceivable way.
This book brings a new approach to parenting and offers a unique viewpoint on how to do the best for your children. First I need to shift your perspective ever so slightly and to do that I will have to explain to you the concept of ‘High vibrational thinking’.
‘Children are incredibly vulnerable to rejection, ridicule, criticism and anger at home and they deserve to grow up in an environment of safety, acceptance and warmth’ -Dr James Dobson-American evangelical Christian author and psychologist
HVT (High Vibrational Thinking)
'If you want to find the secrets of the Universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration'. -Dr Nicola Tesla-
High vibrational thinking is a simple concept; all you have to do is understand that we live in a world where everything is made of energy. Any scientist or physicist will tell you that nothing is really solid even though it appears to be. Everything is made up from atoms, it’s all energy and all energy is vibrating.
This includes us, we are also not really solid and we are vibrating because we are also made from atoms just like your house, car, shoes, clothes, cat, dog, food, chair, etc. It’s a world of energy that we live in and it’s all vibrating. You could see the energy particles vibrating if you had a powerful enough microscope.
Science tells us that the fastest vibrating energy in our world is love and the slowest vibrating energy is fear. Our world exists within these two parameters. And as we are made from energy the faster we are vibrating the better we feel, the slower we are vibrating the worse we feel. That means the closer we are vibrating to the energy of love the better we feel, and the closer we are vibrating to the energy of fear the worse we feel.
This is why we say we are ‘buzzing’ or ‘high’ when we feel good and also why we say we are ‘down in the dumps’ or ‘flat as a pancake’ when we feel bad, we are really talking about our energy vibration. Thoughts, feelings and actions that make us feel good like laughing, honesty, joy, peace, and success are high vibrational, they lift up our vibration, so that’s why we feel happy when our mind is filled with these things.
Thoughts, feelings and actions that make us feel unhappy like anger, jealousy, hate, greed, failure and fear are low vibrational, they drag down our vibration, so that’s why we feel unhappy when our mind is filled with these negative things. So that’s easy enough to understand, the higher our energy field is vibrating the better we feel and the easier our life will be because all the low vibrational negative stuff exists in the lower vibrations and it can’t affect us when we are ‘high’.Of course every day is like a roller coaster ride as we whiz up and down the vibrations experiencing lots of different energies, high and low.
The trick is to get less upset and drawn in by the low vibrational stuff and it will drag you down less, it will have a less damaging affect if you don’t emotionally buy into it. Then you will spend more of your time in the higher vibrations, it’s all about what’s going on in your mind positive or negative. Such as, if you feel angry and frustrated because you have just had an argument with somebody you may let it get hold of you and churn over in your mind, this will drag you down and make you feel bad. And when you are in a bad feeling place you will find other things could easily start going wrong.
Whereas if you try to ignore it and let it pass without buying into it, it will hurt you less, drag you down less. Remember the further away you are from the vibration of love the worse it feels and the more difficult your life will be. High vibrational thinking is about managing your mind to stay in the higher vibrations as much as possible. It’s about being aware of what’s going on in your mind and trying not to engage the negative thoughts and feelings.
‘We are beings of pure energy’ -Dr Bradley Nelson-The Emotion Code
Understanding HVT is that simple, teach yourself to stay in the high vibrations where life is great; away from the lower vibrational energies, that’s the secret. When we have no awareness of HVT it is easy to see why many of us get drawn into whatever is going on and as a result get dragged down into the lower vibrational zones. Now that you know how HVT works in our lives there is one more thing I need to explain so that you can fully understand how to do the best for your children and I refer to it as your inner resistance.
‘Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of what you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy, this is physics’. -Albert Einstein-Theoretical physicist and philosopher of science
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. -Rumi-
Your ‘inner resistance’ is the negative energy that you have got stuck inside of you and this resistance is pulling you down in vibration away from the fastest vibrational energy that we know, love. Your inner resistance is the barrier within yourself that is keeping you away from love. Everybody has this and it is mainly created, in the first five or six years of our lives.
During this time period we are operating just like a computer and downloading data. Everything that we experience and are taught we soak up like a sponge. The main source of our early years information downloading is our parents and close family. Our early experiences are accepted without question, as we absorb whatever is going on around us. We believe what we see and hear and from this information downloading we begin forming our ‘inner resistance’ as some of the negative stuff that we encounter and experience gets stuck in our energy field.
‘Every emotion has its own special vibrational frequency, anger is different to frustration and when you feel an intense emotion you take on its vibration and sometimes it gets stuck and it’s like a ball of energy’
-Dr Bradley Nelson-The Emotion Code
A good analogy would be to imagine a slab of butter just out of the fridge so its quite solid and you try to cut into it with a blunt knife, it would be difficult to cut into it. Now imagine cutting into the same slab of butter with a red hot sharp knife. It would easily cut deep into the butter. Further still picture the red hot sharp knife covered in something sticky maybe treacle and then dipped in soot.
The treacle and soot represents negativity and you can now see when the knife cuts through the butter it would leave dirt stuck deep within the butter. This is how our mind works, when we are young especially under six-years old, negative experiences cut deep into our supple and impressionable young mind and each cut leaves a residue of negative energy, it leaves dirt buried in our mind.
The deeper the cut (or the more severe the experience) the more negativity is left within us. It becomes embedded deep within us and this is what collects and forms our inner resistance. Imagine a three year old in the room when his parents are having a terrible argument. Anger, hate, frustration and fear would be flashing across the room like bolts of lightening and these negative energies would cut through the child like a hot knife through butter. This would leave a deep impression and residue left from those energies would be forever implanted into the child. This is how we pick it up from early experiences in our lives. Then we are stuck with it for life.
Every negative thought, feeling and emotion we have or experience leaves its mark in your energy field and this accumulation of dark sludge forms your inner resistance. The bad part is that this sludge is very difficult to shift because every time we engage in another negative experience this recharges its battery.
Negative feelings like anger, hate, fear, frustration, worry, stress, jealously and fear etc keep it strong within us and this becomes part of us, part of who we are. And this is all picked up from everyday things we see happening in front of us. At the age of around six-years old we more or less stop the downloading and whatever we have downloaded up until that point becomes well and truly entrenched. It’s a bit like loading a program onto a computer only this time it has been loaded into our mind.
And like a computer we are limited by the program, we can only do what the program can do; some people call this living within our comfort zone. Of course after six-years old our comfort zones may change slightly as the years go by but in general the downloading in place at six-years old stays more or less the same.
This negative energy that everybody downloads is what I call our ‘inner resistance’ some teachings call it your ‘inner demons’ or ‘trapped emotional energy’. And because it is heavy slow vibrational energy, it slows down our natural vibration and holds us down at a lower vibrational level. A level that we get used to and accept as where we belong, hence the term comfort zone, although I see it more as a ‘vibrational comfort zone’.
A person that has experienced a very positive energy upbringing, which would be happy, loving caring parents, few family arguments, very little negative energy from the TV, DVD’s and computer games etc, may only have a small amount of ‘inner resistance’ holding them down so they would exist generally at quite a high vibrational level.
A person subject to a large amount of negative energy such as lots of family arguments, family money problems, maybe your parents split up when you are young, family feelings of frustration, bullying, stress, worry, greed, hatred, negative gossiping and fear etc, could end up with a lot of negative energy stuck inside them, creating a powerful and heavy ‘inner resistance’. So they would exist generally at a lower vibrational level.
‘Many of the things that are pushed upon the masses creates negative emotional molecules, once they are formed they are real and you can’t get them out of your body unless you know how’. -Don Tolman-Whole Foods Nutritionist and Author
This ‘inner resistance’ or ‘trapped negative emotional molecules’ has a powerful influence over us and this sometimes distorts and twists our mind so much that we behave in dysfunctional ways, I think we have all done that at some time in our lives. ‘Inner resistance’ is the major factor in all negative behaviour such as: bullying, anti-social behaviour, crime, violence, vandalism, self-harming, alcoholism, drug addiction, gang culture, lack of respect, selfishness and depression, etc.
Our ‘inner resistance’ is where all the negative feelings that we have about ourselves and the world around us are stored. It is where our unhappiness dwells within us, it is our unhappiness. It is slow vibrating energy and when it contaminates our energy field it slows our energy vibration down and drags us further away from the vibration of love. The further away from love we are the worse it feels and the more likely we are to think negatively, malfunction and encounter problems in our lives.
‘Our thoughts can make us sick’ -Joe Dispenza-Neuroscientist, Lecturer and Author
Maybe you feel your parents didn’t show you as much love as you would have liked them to but remember they also have ‘inner resistance’ and they can’t help lots of the things that they do, just like you sometimes. They are doing or did the best that they can under the influence of their ‘inner resistance’. Maybe they let you down sometimes or don’t spend much time with you or even don’t tell you or have never told you that they love you.
This just means that they have a strong ‘inner resistance’ controlling them and probably don’t even realise they are doing these things. This is just them malfunctioning. Many of us develop most of our inner resistance through our relationship with our parents. Lack of love or lots of negative behaviour in that department makes it fertile ground for negativity to take root. It gets established at an early impressionable age and forces us into repetitive patterns of negative thinking and feeling, which ensures its survival. It’s not our parents fault, they couldn’t help it and continuing to blame them simply keeps you locked in the cycle of negative thinking.
They couldn’t help whatever they may have done to make you feel ‘unloved’, you must release the negativity you feel around this subject. And you do that by understanding how it works (which you now do) and forgiving them, this frees you up from the bad feeling. Let it go and you will rise in vibration. Hold on to the bad feelings and you will be trapped, trapped by blame, hate, anger etc. They were subject to the power of their inner resistance; understand this and you will be free. Hold onto the bad feelings and this will keep you stuck in the lower vibrations where you will certainly encounter more difficulties.
Your ‘inner resistance’ is like your mobile phone battery and needs to be charged up every day only you don’t plug it in and charge it up with electricity, it gets recharged by your negative thoughts and feelings. Its powerful negative influence taints your thoughts and feelings and the energy generated through anger, irritation, frustration, worry etc recharges it. It’s a cycle of negativity that we get stuck in.
The worse you feel the more it gets charged up. It needs you to get angry, feel upset, be frustrated, feel jealous or feel depressed and unhappy. It’s like a little gremlin living inside you that wants negative things to happen so that you feel bad. This is how it survives. Its powerful influence is constantly having an affect on how you feel. And because you have this energy inside you it will taint and draw your thoughts towards the negative. If you didn’t have it inside you everything would suddenly look a lot more positive and you would feel much happier.
‘I am absolutely convinced it is our trapped emotions and traumas and anxieties and unprocessed life experiences that we hold in our nervous system that is the source of everything that ails us’. -Sonia Choquette-(Founder of 6 Sensory Living and Author)
It also sparks into life many times during your day prompting you to react to things in a negative way. Maybe you lose your key and get frustrated and angry because you can’t find it. Your negative reaction, your frustration and anger is what your ‘inner resistance’wants.
When you are looking for your key it is the little voice in your head saying things like ‘you will be late’, ‘you will have to buy a new key’, ‘what if somebody has stolen it’, etc. You just listen to the thoughts thinking that they are yours and get angry and frustrated.
These are not your thoughts they are generated by your inner resistance. The little gremlin is winning, it is getting what it wants and that’s you feeling bad. This is how it stays strong within you, by topping up its battery everyday through your negative thoughts, feelings and emotions. You get angry and you recharge its battery, you worry, feel stressed, feel jealous, feel upset, feel depressed, feel irritated, feel envious, feel guilty, feel annoyed, feel unloved or feel disillusioned, you are topping up its battery.
So the more powerful your ‘inner resistance’ is, the heavier it is and the more it will drag you down and the more topping up it will need. That means more time spent in a negative state and more problems in your life because as we learned through high vibrational thinking all the bad negative stuff is in the lower vibrational zones.
That’s where it lives, you can’t feel anger, hate, jealousy, greed, depression, etc. when you are high, you can only feel these things when your vibration drops down. Developing ‘inner resistance’ is nobody’s fault and it’s something that we all do. Everybody has this it’s impossible to not get it. In the world as it is today the experience of negative energy is very much a part of life and impossible to avoid.
This makes ‘inner resistance’part of everybody’s life. It has an effect on our relationships, health, work, the level of success we can achieve, the amount of money that flows into our life and that we can hold on to, it affects everything. In some people it can manifest as a constant bad mood, flaring up over virtually anything.
Making the person a prickly character to be around, lashing out at anybody in the firing line. It even changes the way you look, as the demon within takes you over and lives through you contorting your face in different ways. A beautiful person can change and look ugly when their inner resistance is active and in charge.
You often pick up behaviour patterns from your parents, maybe one of them was feisty and aggressive in their demeanor and you were repeatedly on the receiving end as a child. This could easily create the same type of inner resistance within you, which would leave you with the same behaviour patterns.
Really it doesn't matter how it got there we have all got it, at this point it's no big deal how we got it, your focus now needs to be on getting rid of it. To change things for the better you must weaken and get rid of your ‘inner resistance’. You must get rid of this heavy slow vibrating energy that has got stuck in your energy field and dragged you down. It is holding you at a set vibrational level, like a balloon that is being held under water.
Get rid of it and you will rush to the surface, just like the balloon would if you released it. Otherwise nothing will change; you will live your life stuck at a set vibration because of your ‘inner resistance’ getting the same problems and niggles day after day. You will be experiencing the same negative feelings and emotions over and over every day of your life. Anger, frustration, irritation, impatience, envy, disappointment, worry, hate and fear etc will be bouncing in and out of your mind over just about anything. It’s a never ending merry go round of negative thinking and feeling, trapping you in the lower vibrations.
Many families and relationships are locked into this repetitive cycle of never ending conflict, arguing and fighting with each other almost on a daily basis but what they don’t realise is, that it is their respective inner resistance that is behind all of the negativity and they are really just pawns in the game. It’s inner resistance fighting with inner resistance and for many of them sometimes it all gets too much and they slip even further down in vibration and this is when we say they are suffering from depression, which means ‘pressed down’ need I say any more.
‘If you want to awaken all of humanity, then awaken all of yourself. If you want to eliminate the suffering in the world, then eliminate all that is dark and negative in yourself. Truly, the greatest gift you have to give is that of your own transformation’. -Lao Tzu-Ancient Chinese philosopher and poet
How to give your children a happy life
Your job as a parent is the most important responsibility of your life. You are literally (especially in your child’s first six years) determining the future that your child will have because whatever you tell them, show them or allow them to be subject to, they readily and innocently accept.
They are downloading information on a daily basis through what they see and hear happening in front of them and during the first six years they have no filters or previous experience to draw on, so they simply accept whatever happens as absolute fact. You are teaching them how the world is through your behaviour, actions, beliefs and expectations and they eagerly and unquestioningly download this information into their subconscious mind, they soak it up like a sponge.
Any negative energy that you express and show them or allow them to be subject to they also take on board and this begins to form their inner resistance, which they will have to contend with for the rest of their lives. This early years downloading sets the vibrational boundaries or comfort zones that they will more than likely be chained to for good and once the boundaries are set, it can be very difficult to break free from them.
As parents you are setting out the blueprint for your child’s future. You are having a massive influence on whether they have a life of struggle and strife or success and happiness depending on what you teach and subject them to, especially in the first six years. It’s all about the energy that you allow into your family home and your job is to bring them up in a home filled with as much high vibrational energy as possible.
A home filled with love, happiness, joy, kindness, laughter, fun, consideration, caring, unselfishness, encouragement, discipline, sensible rules, good routines, strict sensible bedtimes etc…. is vitally important to how your child will feel about themselves for their entire lives. Sensible rules and discipline shows your child that you care and that you love them, lack of rules and discipline they can very easily subconsciously interpret as maybe you don’t love them and don’t care so much.
It leaves the door open ajar for their inner resistance to go about its business of subtly whispering negative thoughts into their ear. It’s important here to understand that when as a parent you discipline and teach your children good manners, as well as teach them how to be thoughtful and considerate to others, you are helping them to grow up feeling good about themselves.
This helps dignity, self-respect, pride and unselfishness to develop and flourish all of which encourage positive thoughts and feelings about the self. And of course when you are nice and kind to other people they are nice and kind to you, they are not having negative thoughts and feelings about you, they are not firing negative energy at you. If you let children misbehave and get away with it you are in fact by not correcting their behaviour when they are being inconsiderate, negative and thoughtless to others, saying it is okay to behave in that way without respect for others.
You are teaching them it’s okay to act in a selfish negative disrespectful way that doesn’t take the feelings of others into account. This can establish within them habitual negative behaviour patterns, which will damage them in the long run, as they will when displaying selfish behaviour be faced with frustration, anxiety and anger from the people that they are hurting, irritating and annoying.
This creates a negative cycle of energy that will as long as they are putting it out there rebound back onto them. Antagonising, irritating, disrespectful, belligerent and spoilt behaviour creates frustration, anger, annoyance, exasperation and bad feelings coming back at them and this just strengthens or even adds to the inner resistance within them, cementing them even more firmly to the vibrational level they are at.
Remember the energy environment that you grow up in generally becomes the energy environment that you spend the rest of your life in. A childhood full of anger, hate, struggle, frustration, disillusionment and the experience of parents that don’t bother to administer discipline correctly because they don’t understand the consequences or are too selfish to care condemns your child to a life surrounded by thoughts, feelings and emotions that embody these types of energies, which means they will attract experiences that reflect these types of energies.
They can end up stuck for a lifetime in repetitive negative energy cycles of their own making as their inner resistance continuously replenishes itself at their expense. If they make other people feel negative in any way through their behaviour you need to correct the behaviour and explain to them it’s not acceptable to do this to other people. If you don’t then you are allowing bad traits to develop which can soon become entrenched within their personality and this is always going to come back and hurt them. It’s simple put good energy out get good energy back, put bad energy out get bad energy back.
Follow this simple guideline and you will be getting it right and this is good parenting and of course most parents naturally do this. On the other hand a childhood full of love, compassion, kindness, happiness, joy, fun and real thoughtful caring parenting means a lifetime surrounded by these types of energies attracting these types of experiences. I am sure I know where I would prefer my children to be. You are determining the level and strength of ‘inner resistance’ that your child will have through your positive influence and behaviour in front of them.
The importance of this cannot be underestimated. Quality time spent playing with your child will help them much more than simply telling them to watch a DVD or entertain themselves with a computer game. Of course there is nothing wrong with computer games (some of them) or DVD's especially when you encourage them with love and affection to enjoy watching or playing but when it's done with frustration and stress because you can’t be bothered you are creating the wrong energy.
Really it's about getting the balance right and when you have got time for them always try to be positive, interested and loving, as this affirms your love for them. Try to keep negative energy out of your home, never argue in front of the children. If you have a disagreement sort it out when the kids are not there. Never let them hear about any problems that you may be having.
Every family will experience the everyday ups and downs of life, arguments, money issues, health problems, cars breaking down, boilers bursting, washers flooding the kitchen etc. When these things happen accept them without the negativity that is usually generated, keep the frustration, anger, stress, worry, anxiety etc, out of it especially in front of the children. It’s important that you do your best to manage your mind and stay positive.
Any negative energy that gets into your family home will have a negative impact on your children for life. Many TV programmes are filled with negativity. Even the soaps are now massive generators of negative energy. Subjecting your children and indeed yourself to negative energy from your TV set is not good for either of you and if your children are under six years old the damage can be long lasting. There are positive options, feel good movies; cartoons, fun game shows and comedies are a much better form of entertainment to allow into your home than programmes filled with anger, arguments and frustration.
Be positive about money, health and relationships. Your relationship with money is what they download and become stuck with. If you struggle with money or always have the feeling of never having enough, they will pick this up and absorb this energy from you. They will then be monitored by their inner resistance for the rest of their lives to always feel that money is a struggle. For example years later when they get the chance of a good, well-paid job they may find that they are driven from within to find someway to sabotage that opportunity.
They will fail because their inner resistance wants them to because it is sticking to the energy boundaries downloaded in childhood. I have seen people do this (and done it myself) time and time again, come up with a list of feeble excuses to leave a good job, often it defies logic and it’s never their fault. There is always somebody else or something else to blame, its never them but in fact it is always them, its their inner resistance getting its way and keeping them in the vibrational comfort zones that it naturally gravitates to.
What you are witnessing is the person’s inner resistance heavily influencing them and it’s not always in their interests, it simply wants to stick to the vibrational boundaries because this ensures its survival. Remember its presence within you keeps the negative energy flowing through your thoughts, feelings and emotions. This never ending routine keeps it strong and powerful.
This is how it survives; it needs negativity on a daily basis to maintain it's presence at the vibrational level it has become used to and you are the supplier. This is how it works; your children absorb your vibrational energy about everything, which forms the inner resistance within them. So be very careful what you subject them to.
Even if you are struggling with money don’t show this to them, give the impression that everything is fine and money is easy to get and this will help them download a better feeling towards money then they will find years later that money comes into their life more easily. Typical negative phrases around the subject of money like ‘who do you think I am Rockefeller’ and ‘money doesn’t grow on trees’ should never be used in front of your children.
This is how you program them negatively about money and when they do get the opportunity of that well paid job later in life they may find their inner resistance getting in the way sabotaging their success. This is why we say love in childhood means a happier more successful life, it really does and I mean love in the broader sense, joy, fun, consideration, thoughtfulness, laughter, happiness, sincerity etc. Another way of saying it would be ‘a childhood filled with high vibrational energies means a better life’.
This applies equally to relationships; your children will observe your relationship and begin forming their inner resistance and beliefs about relationships based on this, which will determine how their relationships will more then likely go in the future. If they see you arguing they will absorb that energy and it may manifest in their relationships in the future. If they see you constantly complaining about your health they will more than likely accept that this is how it is and eventually begin doing the same?
The way that your inner resistance manifests through you programs your children to do the same. If you want a better life for your children then you must overcome the urges of your inner resistance and only allow high vibrational energies to enter the family home.
Always tell your children that they are the best, they can do anything if they try, and they are wonderful, beautiful, amazing, fantastic, incredible, and most importantly that they are loved. You can never tell them this enough. Knowing that your parents love you is the most important factor in keeping their level of inner resistance at a minimum.
As soon as they are born whisper this (or something like it) to them every night when you put them to bed and you will be programming their subconscious (which is very programmable when they are just falling asleep) for a successful, happy, high vibrational life, 'you are beautiful, you are amazing, you can do anything and I love you more than anything in the world'.
It’s all common sense really and now you understand the principles of ‘High vibrational thinking’ and how you develop your inner resistance, you can see why allowing negative energy a free reign in your family home can be so damaging.
When they start school and bring you home their school report always talk excitedly about the good points make a big fuss of this and when that’s all done you could quietly mention the things they could do better in. This is the way to keep them feeling good and how to help them do better. Never emphasise the negative issues, make light of them and don’t generate any bad feelings.
Remember negative energy has no place in your home if you are to do the best for your children. Your job is to ensure that your children have the least possible exposure to negative energy and the maximum possible exposure to positive energy.
This will make sure that they grow up with the best vibrational program downloaded into their mind, which means a lower level of ‘inner resistance’. This will then help them feel good about themselves and life in general, which will create the best possible life in the future, free from many of the problems and difficulties that we have all been subject to. Most of us have grown up in an environment where negative energy has run rampant and our parents had no idea that the daily engagements of negativity were damaging us. Arguments, anger, moaning, stress, anxiety, fear, frustration, negative gossip and lack of affection were considered normal thoughts, feelings and emotions to express.
This gave many of us a difficult life path to travel chained to the lower vibrational zones by the weight of our ‘inner resistance’. No wonder so many people have struggled in their lives. Well now you know how it works you have the opportunity to change all of that for your children. It’s very simple, the lower your vibration the harder everything is, all the problems exist down there so why would anybody want to live down there. Stay in the higher vibrations and life is wonderful.
Happiness, success, peace, joy and love exist in the higher vibrations and that’s where you want your children to live their lives. Create a home for them with as much high vibrational energy as possible, this will give them the least possible ‘inner resistance’ ensuring that they will exist and live their lives at the highest possible vibration and you will have achieved the greatest success of your life.
Remember the first six years are the most important. A strong and powerful level of ‘inner resistance’ means a life of struggle and the more of it there is the worse it will be. A low level of ‘inner resistance’ means a far easier, happier and more successful life in the higher vibrations where all the good stuff is. The best thing you can do now for your children is work on breaking down and releasing your inner resistance. This will make it easier for you to keep negative energy out of your home and this will ensure a better energy environment for your children. The next chapter shows you how to do this.
‘The first six years have so much to do with how the next 80 turn out’ -Bill Gates Snr-Co-Chairman of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation
How to Get Rid of Your ‘Inner Resistance’ I wanted to give you one simple practice that would enable you to work on getting rid of your inner resistance, which would allow you rise in vibration. I have read too many books that make it too complicated to effect change. Too much stuff to do and I know from my experience that life gets in the way and you can soon lose momentum and forget to stick to the daily routine needed to make improvements in your life. It must be simple and it must be twenty-four hours a day.
A daily practice that becomes a way of life. This is the way to change things and overcome your inner resistance, which is always alert and ready to seize the opportunity. You must have the same alertness and this method gives you that. This method is easy to implement and because its 24/7 means you are on a competitive level with your inner resistance, always alert and it will help hold you in the higher vibrations while you work on getting rid of your inner resistance. This means you will see improvements from the moment you start using it. Now let’s have a look at how it works.
When we look at ‘inner resistance’ and high vibrational thinking together we can see that someone with not much ‘inner resistance’ in general exists at a higher vibrational level than somebody with a lot of ‘inner resistance’. They have less of a heavy weight dragging them down. Training yourself not to react when negativity try’s to grasp your mind is how you weaken and get rid of your ‘inner resistance’. I will show you one simple method to do this; it’s called the ‘Notebook’.
The ‘Notebook’ Get yourself a small notebook and write down every time that you notice yourself feeling negative (angry, frustrated, worried, tense, scared, depressed, anxious, jealous, envious, hateful, hurt, upset, irritated, annoyed, depressed, unhappy, unloved etc). Keep your notebook with you at all times and keep an eye on how you feel, so that you can notice when you feel negative. It may be a nasty comment from somebody, stressed out from losing your key, a twinge of jealousy, an argument with someone, feeling down because you have no money, maybe listening to somebody’s problems, or even just your own negative thoughts ticking over making you feel not so good. Whatever it is, write it down.
Entries may look something like this: So and so said something nasty about me, I feel down. Had a fight with my friend, I am upset. I have no money, I feel stressed. Somebody stole something from me, I am angry. Lost my keys, I am frustrated. So and so has been moaning on about their problems, I feel depressed.
It may even be just the way you are feeling with no particular thoughts fueling it. I could go on all day as you can see there are endless little niggles that pop up all of the time and most of the time we allow ourselves to feel some form of negativity, we just do it automatically. This is what you are trying to stop. It’s this daily engaging in negative thoughts and feelings that is keeping the negative energy within you strong. You are topping up its battery all of the time, you are constantly recharging your ‘inner resistance’.
Stop reacting and your ‘inner resistance’ will start losing its power and eventually fizzle away. It’s the strong emotional reactions like ‘outbursts of anger’ that give it a powerful super charge and your endless negative thoughts and feelings triggered by the inevitable daily niggles that you encounter that give it a constant trickle charge. If you didn’t allow yourself to feel bad when the daily niggles are happening your ‘inner resistance’ would weaken and your energy vibration would rise.
By noticing your thoughts, feelings and emotions you are stopping it in its tracks and this will begin to weaken the negative energy within you. Over time you will start feeling better and better as you slowly rise in vibration. You are releasing your ‘inner resistance’ and cleansing your energy field; all you have to do is train yourself to write in your notebook. If you do this everything in your life will improve, you see the higher your vibration the better everything is. You will soon be vibrating at the vibrational levels where the better stuff is.
Happiness, fun, joy, laughter, kindness, success and love don’t exist at the lower vibrational levels you can only feel or experience them when your vibration rises. So you will be happier more of the time, you will exist where the good stuff is more of the time. Just like you can’t be depressed when you are feeling happy, the two cannot exist together. You will find that when you get your vibration up everything works out better and your problems seem to disappear. You get on better with everybody, have more friends, feel much better and are a lot more successful in whatever you are doing.It is possible when you use the ‘Notebook’ you may find that you have the occasional bad dream.
Where you wake up feeling frightened, stressed, and angry or whatever, this is your ‘inner resistance’ trying to get its charge during your sleep. It happens because you have slowed down its charge during the day by following the Notebook and it is losing the inner battle. This should be regarded as a good sign that you are on the right track. Treat the bad feelings in your dream exactly the same as during your day, detach from them and write them down. This is an easy method to follow and it gets the job done.
It trains you to observe your thoughts and feelings and recognise when they are negative, which automatically disengages you from the damaging energy. And that’s the secret, not allowing negativity to take you over and live through you. It is absolutely essential if you want to change your life in a positive way and do the best for your children that you follow a strategy like this to rid yourself of the inner resistance within you that is dragging you down.
‘Learn to let go that is the key to happiness’ -Buddha- How it may work
I will give you an example of how influential your early years are in terms of affecting the rest of your life. This is a typical scenario that I am sure many of us can identify with to some degree.
I will take you through two different life paths that Dave could have taken depending on the amount of negativity he was subject to in his formative years. In the first example Dave is subject to quite a lot of negativity as his parents both carried strong doses of inner resistance and this meant Dave would often be in the middle of, or on the receiving end of negative outbursts. In the second example Dave was brought up in a much more positive environment surrounded by lots of high vibrational energies.
These examples will show you more or less how it works, of course every individual responds differently and would be affected differently with personality, temperament, and genes etc playing a part but this will show you the mechanics of the process.
Scenario 1 Dave was brought up in a typical working class household. The family was never well off but they always got by, you could say life was a bit of a struggle. There were often arguments and when Dave was young he was subject to all kinds of negative energy generated by his parents. Anger, frustration, worry, stress, anxiety, unhappiness and fear were common everyday feelings bouncing around the household.
This negativity took its toll and Dave picked up many of these energies, which were to stay with him for life. Sure enough at a very early age he started to show tendencies to be angry, frustrated and unhappy, as the negative energies manifested through him. ‘Look at our Dave’ they would say ‘a temper on him just like his dad’, as if that were something to be proud of and obviously not realising that it was a burden that he would have to carry throughout his life, a temper that would manifest through him by way of mild irritability, angry outbursts or occasionally even more severe bouts of intense rage or even violence.
This brooding negativity within Dave kept him firmly rooted to the lower vibrations as it fed mercilessly off his thoughts, feelings and emotions. He seemed to be generally in a bad mood or distant somehow, as his inner attention was generally distracted by negative thoughts and feelings. His inner resistance was strong within him and you could always sense its presence hovering just beneath the surface. This played havoc with Dave’s life from day one and he didn’t do very well at school even though he was above average intelligence, he just couldn’t seem to apply himself and the teachers said he lacked concentration.
In other words he was distracted by what was going on in his mind, the constant thought patterns playing over and over generally of a negative nature due to his strong inner resistance. This is how it messes with your mind pushing in thoughts designed to get you worrying about this or that or maybe feeling sorry for yourself. Its overbearing presence can be relentless in its quest to keep you in a negative state of mind. Dave was also a promising footballer but again he seemed to lack motivation and just couldn’t be bothered to put the training in needed to advance his chances. He left school with no qualifications and started hanging around with the wrong types, which occasionally resulted in brushes with the police.
This resulted in a criminal record and as a result poor job prospects. Dave did eventually get a job at the local Steel Works thanks to his dad’s cousin but this didn’t work out, as Dave felt they had it in for him from the start. After six months he walked out after an argument with the foreman and found himself back as one of the unemployed. Eventually Dave got married to Tracy his childhood sweetheart and they had two children. The marriage was a rocky one with Dave’s temper often causing problems and within three years they were divorced and he found himself in a custody battle to see the children.
This went on for a number of years and created a bitter feud between him and Tracy, as they tussled to and fro over money issues and access. I wish I could say things got better but they didn’t and Dave’s life went from bad to worse with him eventually becoming dependant on alcohol and wasting any money that he did have everyday at the pub. This contributed to problems with his health and at forty-five years of age he found himself with serious health issues. Dave’s life is typical of many that face a similar difficult and negative childhood. They can never gain control from their inner resistance that basically devours them in its never ending need for more and more negative energy.
They spend their life at the mercy of their inner resistance feeding its needs and destroying their life in the process, they are in fact simply generators of negative energy through their thoughts, feelings and emotions for the demon within. It may help at this point to see your inner resistance as an intelligent life form in its own right that cleverly plots and manipulates you to get what it wants. It pushes thoughts into your mind that you think are yours to steer you down the pathways that it wants, which is always ultimately to create more negativity.
This is the inner battle of good against evil, the light against the dark, which is taking place within every one of us. It was the voice in Dave’s head that convinced him and drained him of energy so that he couldn’t be bothered to go to football training when he was young, you see if Dave had succeeded at football that would have generated all the wrong types of energy for his inner resistance, which of course had already established itself within him due to the energy environment he had been subject to at an early age.
Joy, fulfillment, success and happiness are no good whatsoever to your inner resistance it needs much more negative thoughts and feelings from you. Your inner resistance will systematically destroy your chances of success in any direction in order to keep you as a slave to its needs; it doesn’t care about you one bit. Many people are even driven to suicide by their inner resistance. Dave’s inner resistance went on to sabotage his job, it was the voice in his head telling him that they all had it in for him, which steered him into believing it was him against them. Then it destroyed his marriage and encouraged the bitter dispute between him and Tracy.
Now I am not saying that was all Dave’s fault as Tracy too has her own inner resistance, which will also have been happy to engage in the conflict. They were both victims of their inner resistance, as their marriage became inner resistance against inner resistance the basis of many relationships today. Then it encouraged him onto the drink, which it will convince him is a way of easing the never end stream of negative, thoughts and feelings in other words it will make him feel better. Although in fact it just created more through lack of self-worth, guilt and self-hate.
Dave’s inner resistance was very clever and it spent a lifetime manipulating him to get what it wanted and its biggest weapon was the fact that he didn’t know it was there. This gave it a free reign to quietly and mercilessly go about its destructive business. This is what is happening to all of us, maybe to a lesser degree than Dave or maybe we have it worse than Dave but we all have it. This is what we are all up against and this is the real struggle of life and its all taking place within our mind. Now let’s have a look at how Dave’s life may have turned out if he had had a more positive energy environment at the start.
Scenario 2 Dave grew up in a working class household in a lovely positive family environment. Both of his parents carried very little inner resistance and it showed, they were loving, positive and very caring people. They rarely argued and they were in general happy and content.
This positive energy environment meant that Dave grew up collecting along the way very little inner resistance because in the all important first six years he rarely experienced negativity in the family home. He was shown lots of love by both of his parents and they were both very comfortable telling him they loved him.
All this positive energy in his childhood meant he was living his life in the higher vibrations where negative energy was at a minimum and this gave him confidence in himself. He knew his parents loved him and he also knew he deserved the best things in life, why shouldn’t he after all this was what he was used to.
You could say Dave was content and happy with himself, not a lot of negative thoughts and feelings getting in the way. He did really well at school passing all of his exams and he excelled at football captaining the school team. He really enjoyed his football and couldn’t wait for Saturday morning when they had a league game.
When he left school his dad’s cousin managed to get him a start at the local Steel Works and Dave was on his way, within three years he was promoted and he never looked back. He married his childhood sweetheart Tracy and they had two lovely children. Dave’s good job meant he could afford one of the big new houses at the end of the road, a new car and an expensive family holiday every year. They were a happy family and their children also grew up with little inner resistance holding them back.
Dave and Tracy stayed together throughout their lives and now have three lovely grandchildren. This is exactly how it works, if you grow up in a negative energy environment you will pick up and get stuck with lots of damaging inner resistance that will manifest through you for the rest of your life. If you grow up in a positive energy environment you will pick up very little inner resistance so you will not be carrying inside you something that will wreak havoc in your life.
You can see clearly how it works; with a powerful dose of inner resistance Dave had a difficult struggling life. With a small dose of inner resistance Dave was free to have a great life. The question is which path do you want your children to take because it’s up to you? Now you have read this book it’s your responsibility to fill your family home with as much high vibrational energy as possible, as much love, joy, fun, positive encouragement and happiness as you can.
Give your kids quality time and keep the negativity out. If you are fortunate enough to carry only a little inner resistance yourself you will be doing this naturally and now you can see exactly how important this is. If you carry a heavier dose of inner resistance you may be allowing too much negativity in but now you understand how it works so you can do something about it.
And don’t forget even though we don’t remember most of our first six years we are still left with an energy imprint, a vibrational range that we have basically downloaded through what we have experienced. And we then become tethered to this frequency range usually for the rest of our lives as the inner resistance we picked up manifests through us. The Notebook is a great way for you to start breaking down and releasing your inner resistance so that you can rise in vibration, which is the first step in improving your family energy environment, (this applies equally to teachers, the less prone you are to engaging negative energy the less you will create or add to it in the school environment).
If your children are past six years old it’s still important to change the energy in your home to as high vibrational as you can and to educate them through this book of how it works. They can also follow the Notebook method to break down and release their inner resistance. It’s never too late to change things and the sooner you get started the better.
The Negative Rut
A childhood that leaves you with a strong dose of inner resistance (like Dave in scenario 1) can chain you to a life in the lower vibrations, a life stuck in a negative rut. This can lead to all sorts of problems and difficulties and many in this position end up unemployed, in poor health, in financial trouble, problems with drugs and alcoholism, relationship issues, depression, in prison etc.
A lethargic attitude to work may develop and even a festering intolerance for authority of any sort plus many other negative traits. It’s not a nice place to spend your life but unfortunately many in this day and age are finding themselves stuck here and it is almost impossible to get out of. It is effectively a trap, a swamp of negative energy that sucks you in during childhood and keeps you down.
Many living in this low vibrational place find that their inner resistance becomes so powerful it is manifesting through them virtually all of the time. This is a potentially very unhappy place to spend your life. When lots of people slip into this condition the negative energy that is generated can spiral out and hurt all of us, as the town, county or country that we live in gets dragged down by this overpowering force.
You only have to look around to see evidence of this happening all around us. It creates more poverty, crime, abuse, vandalism, violence, mental issues and illness of all kinds. The more negative the place or area the more it will look dirty, untidy, scruffy, un-maintained and generally run down. This is negativity that you are seeing, the negativity in the people’s minds that are living there, it’s spilling out into the environment.
It’s not their fault it’s just the way that they have been taught to think about the world and themselves. It’s completely different in a place that is populated with more positive minded people, nice gardens, no litter, well maintained pristine properties, etc. You can even feel the energy is different, nicer and lighter even brighter in some way. A major change of mindset is required to break people free from the negative rut mentality and we can start with the children in our care by doing all we can to ensure that they have as positive as possible an upbringing, in the best possible energy environment that we can create.
I believe we can turn it all around and we have to start right now with the children in our care. Getting stuck in a negative rut is virtually guaranteeing a lifetime of unhappiness and problems that will give you a very difficult life path. Ensuring that we do all we can to keep the negativity out of children’s lives and teaching them how it works will empower young people and give them a much more positive outlook and this will help them avoid slipping into the negative rut mentality and give them a better future, a happier future, which will benefit us all.
'Your kids don’t need a perfect Mum, they need a happy one’ -The Parent Bible-
Summary 1. Everything is energy including us and all energy vibrates. 2. The faster your energy vibrates the better you feel because you are closer to the vibration of love. 3. Your ‘inner resistance’ is the negative energy that you carry within and it vibrates slowly. 4. Everybody has ‘inner resistance’ you pick it up mainly in your first six years. 5. To do the best for your children you must bring them up in a family home with as little negative energy present as possible. 6. You can improve the energy environment of your family home by working on getting rid of your inner resistance and always being on your guard watching for negative thoughts and feelings arising within you. 7. The Notebook method will help you achieve this. 8. The more people that understand how it all works the better so if you value this book please tell anybody that you think may benefit from it.
Now it’s up to you, if you want to do the best for your children and begin changing our world for the better you know what you have to do.